The Story of no plot by me and Zanne aka rinoa
by Cheeky Monkie
Summary: This is a story which involves many charcters from final fantasy 8,9 and 10 coming soon. it is a great read and is highley recommended for anyone that is down in the dumps Have Fun!
1. Hotdogs and Trees

Chapter 1  
Once upon a time...there was a girl. This girl needed a plot for her story.  
She thought and thought and thought for days and days, until she finally  
decided to write a story without a plot! And here it is!  
There was once a girl sat by a river side waiting for her true love to  
appear, but he never came. Tears strolled down her cheeks, but then, she  
saw him, in the arms of another woman. She swore for revenge on her. Rinoa  
must die!  
Quistis could not believe that Zell would do this to her. After all he said  
over the hot dog stall. "I love you Quistis, I could never love another  
woman in the entire world. You are my heart and soul; your rays of light  
brighten my day when I am stood next to the hot dog stand. I'd give  
anything up for you.....except hot dogs of course."  
She felt so betrayed. She loved him, and she thought he loved her.  
Rinoa would never buy Zell as many hot dogs as she did! What could he see  
in her?  
"It must be a spell! Just like when that tart stole Squall off her." She  
thought.  
Quistis got up and started to walk over to them when she got side tracked  
by Seifer.  
"Hi Quistis...whoa what's up with you? You got steam coming out of your  
ears...and everything else."  
"...Oh nothing. I'm just a little bit tired that's all."  
"Well... I can waken you up if you like."  
"Yeah...whatever."  
"Been taking lessons off Squall or something? Come on, let's get Zell  
and........"  
"No!" she screamed and she ran off...right into a tree. Glowing bright red  
and ignoring Seifer's yells to come back, she ran off again, straight into  
Squall.  
"Right so that's the balloons, the cake and the hot dogs sorted. What  
next?" asked Zell.  
"The cake is not ready! It says "Hotdogs for President," go back and swap  
it!" said Rinoa strictly.  
"But the hotdogs will get offended if we get rid of it. Besides Quistis  
won't mind."  
"Well me and my Squall care," replied Rinoa firmly.  
"Okay...okay. But don't blame me if the hotdogs come and get you."  
With one stern look from Rinoa, Zell decided that his life was more  
valuable than the cake and went back to the bakers. However just the word  
"hotdog" made Zell crave them and instead of getting the cake fixed he  
scoffed the whole cake!  
Far far in the distance Irvine and Selphie were cuddled up in each others  
arms lying on the beach enjoying the gentle but heavy rain.  
"Oh Irvine booyaka."  
"Mmmm?" he said in a questioning tone as he checked out two girls in  
bikini's who passed to shelter from the heavy rain.  
"Booyaka!" Selphie snapped.  
"Oh...sorry love" he replied and kissed her on the neck affectionately.  
"Let's go, Teddy's getting all wet," she said as she looked into his  
chocolate brown eyes.  
"Do we have to?" Irvine asked, "I'm enjoying the girls I mean um... rain."  
"Right I'm sick of you. Why do you always have to pay attention to other  
girls? We're supposed to be going out!" wailed Selphie. "Teddy thinks  
you're a meany."  
"Alright, come on lets go," Irvine said as he rolled his eyes. 


	2. Secrets and Bread

Chapter 2  
As Squall watched, Quistis fell to the floor. Squall said  
"...Whatever." And he walked on by.  
"Squall wait. There's something I have to tell you..." said Quistis as she  
got hold of him to pull herself up.  
"What is it now Quistis? I have stuff to do." He asked in a besieged tone.  
"Umm..."  
  
"Well what do you think?" asked Zell as he showed Rinoa the cake.  
"Wow. It's amazing. I couldn't have done a better job myself...and that's  
saying something."  
"Ahem. Yeah right!"  
"Well squall agrees with me!"  
"Only because you make him!" mocked Zell.  
"At least I care more about who I'm going out with than hotdogs!"  
"I care just as much about Quistis as I do about hotdogs...maybe even more."  
"I doubt it. You only care about Quistis more when your hotdogs are  
frozen!" laughed Rinoa.  
In their teddy decorated flat house Selphie and Irvine settled down to tea.  
They were just about to start when Laguna burst through the door shouting;  
"Quick hide me the soldiers are after me!"  
"Why what have you done this time? Not another loaf of bread I hope. Were  
getting sick of you doing that." Selphie said with an irritated look on her  
face.  
"I told you the last four times. I only borrowed them. Those soldiers take  
it far too seriously, the baker knows I will pay him for it later but the  
soldiers won't hear of it."  
"You steal the bread and we know it because you told us the first time.  
Anyway get in your usual place and I'm sure Irvine will cover for you."  
said Selphie.  
"Do I have to?"  
"Yes Irvine you do he's your best mate." argued Selphie.  
"Cheers," replied Laguna as he ran down into the cellar and locked the  
door.  
Selphie covered the door with a tatty old carpet and sat down again with  
Irvine to eat her tea, with an innocent face that didn't look so innocent.  
There was a polite rap at the door and Irvine got up to answer it.  
"Just be calm, don't worry about Laguna he will be fine," said Irvine to  
Selphie.  
"I'm fine honest. Just answer the door."  
Irvine looked through the lace curtains to find two soldiers standing side  
by side in the door frame.  
"Can I help you?" he asked as he opened the wooden door.  
"Yes," one of the soldiers replied "we are looking for a man with a loaf of  
bread. Have you seen him?  
"I can't say I have sirs, but if I do you can be assured I will notify you  
straight away." said Irvine in a suspicious tone.  
"Okay. Thank you for your help sir. Good day." And with a smart bow and a  
salute the soldiers left in a smart march. Irvine closed the door turned  
round only to find Selphie crying.  
"Oh Selphie, what's wrong?"  
"I can't take it anymore. It's every week. He takes a loaf of bread, barges  
into our house, locks himself in our basement and we have to cover for him.  
It's too much. I want to go and live in the country with Squall and  
everyone else. PLEASE?"  
"Okay. I've had enough to. And you have asked four times before."  
Selphie kissed Irvine on the cheek and ran off with a skip in her step to  
pack her bags. 


	3. Arguments and Romance

Chapter3

"If you've nothing to say, bye" said Squall which was a long sentence for him.

"Rinoa and Zell are going out!" replied Quistis quickly.

"Whatever" said Squall obvious disbelief in his voice.

Quistis looked at Squall in amazement, "how can he be so stupid to not notice what I have just said. Rinoa is the love of his life and Zell is mine!" she turned round to see Seifer staring at the two of them with a surprised expression on his face.

"You just don't get it do you Squall? All you think of is yourself, oh well if you don't want Rinoa then I shall take her from your grip and love her" said Seifer to Quistis' surprise. Squall punched Seifer in the face in reply. Then he stormed off to find Rinoa.

"Hey wait for me!" yelled Quistis

"I don't want a fan club" replied Squall shocking everyone with his second sentence of the day, usually he didn't say one.

"He must be mad" muttered Seifer as he followed Quistis and Squall for the sake of it.

Zell and Rinoa were laughing about a joke that Rinoa had just said when Zell looked in the distance to find Squall, Quistis and Seifer marching towards them with angry and amused expressions on their faces.

"Rinoa, I hate to break the mood but it looks like we have company!"

"What!?"

"Well...Squall, Quistis and Seifer are on their way. By the way, what are we going to do about all this food and balloons for Quistis' party? If she sees them it will be ruined."

"Um....I dunno....." replied Rinoa.

"Quick! I'll eat all the hot......OW!" yelled Zell as Squall punched him in the face.

"What was that for!" yelled Zell

"Stealing MY girlfriend," snapped Squall

"I didn't know you cared......."said Rinoa as she hugged him, "He's not my boyfriend."

"Don't lie you good for nothing thief!" said Quistis

"What?!" said Rinoa, "I'm not Laguna!" Quistis then slapped her.

"Don't you dare hit MY girlfriend" yelled Squall.

Seifer who was watching all this commotion with an amused expression decided that this was the time where he intruded.

"I think that we all better settle down for a bit because other wise Quistis' surprise party...will...be..." he said with his voice trailing off into a whisper.

"SEIFER!" yelled Rinoa

"Surprise party? For me?" said Quistis

"It was my idea!" said Zell proudly

"No it wasn't!" snapped Rinoa

"Well ok it wasn't but it was my idea to get hotdogs" agreed Zell as he hugged Quistis and kissed her on the head.

"That is sooo sweet. I'm sorry Zell, Rinoa. If I knew I wouldn't have got angry and lashed out. But can we still have the party? _Without hotdogs?"_

"NOOOOOooo," yelled Zell, "You can't have a party, or anything for that matter, without hotdogs!"

Quistis looked at Zell with a bemused look and laughed out loud.

"Ok are we all packed?"

"I think so but I think we should let Laguna out before we go otherwise he will be stuck in the cellar for ever," replied Selphie.

"Oh I think we can leave him in there a few more minutes while we load the motorbike."

"Ok...but I don't think a motorbike will hold all the furniture and all my clothes!"

"Well why don't we tell Laguna that he has to take it all in his land rover as payment for hiding in our cellar all these years" suggested Irvine

"OK," replied Selphie, "Teddy thinks it's a great idea"

So Laguna was let out of the cellar and they all set off to the countryside, Selphie riding on the back of Irvine's motorbike yelling booyaka at the top of her voice.

"We better get there before 6 because that's when Quistis' party starts" yelled Selphie over the roar of the engine.


	4. Fish and Wood

Chapter4

A long, long, long way from Irvine and Selphie and Laguna was the ff9 hero Zidane with his annoying girlfriend Garnet. For some reason he didn't think she was annoying. Garnet was Queen of Alexandria, but although she and Zidane were married, she refused to let him be king because he was 'too immature'. In other words she wanted to be the only royal.

Zidane was just about to announce his love to Garnet, again, when Marcus came running in screaming

"Help, help the fish has jumped out of the water!" he yelled

"Well put the fish back in the water then!" snapped Garnet as she also was about to say something.

"But if I put it back in I will drown it!" said Marcus with an exasperated expression.

"Fish can't drown you numbskull! EIKO!!!" yelled Garnet as Zidane put his arms around her for the sake of it.

Eiko skipped in the room, "Who do you want me to kill now?"

"No one...at the moment. I just want you to explain to Marcus here that YOU CAN'T DROWN FISH"

"But you can....." moaned Marcus

"Kill him" said Zidane

"HEY! You can't give people orders without my permission!" said Garnet in a snobby tone.

At this moment Zell, Quistis, Squall, Rinoa and Seifer were all thoroughly enjoying themselves at Quistis' _surprise_ party. Zell was enjoying his 23rd hotdog as he happily told Quistis how much he loved her more than everything but hotdogs. Squall was being forced to dance with Rinoa to some jazzy music that Zorn and Thorn were playing.

Seifer, who had recently had his hair put in curlers, who was plotting how to steal Rinoa of Squall, was also having a manicure and a massage.

"Seifer! How much longer are you going to be? I want you to come and dance with me. I feel left out because everyone is talking or dancing." said Edea.

"Just a little longer!" replied Seifer.

"But you said that 2 hours ago!" replied Edea annoyed.

Quistis who was now getting impatient decided to sneak off and open her presents alone. But before she could do that Zell grabbed her and whisked her off to the dance floor.

"Zellll! What are you doing I don't mean to sound rude or anything but you CAN'T DANCE!!!" yelled Quistis wincing as he stepped on her foot.

"HEY!!!!" yelled Rinoa as Zell bumped into her and pushed her further into Squall's arms, "Wait....THANKS!"

"Whatever" said Squall rolling his eyes, but secretly enjoying having his Rinoa so close to him.

Marcus and Eiko who had now walked over to the water and thrown Gerald the fish back in were now walking back hand in hand, despite the fact Eiko was going out with Vivi.

"Do you wanna go out wiv me Eiko? I really like you. You do know that don't you?" asked Marcus.

"Erm...Ok, why not" she replied with a mischievous grin on her face. So what if she was going out with Vivi she could handle 2 guys on the go at once.

Marcus hugged Eiko happily as Gerald the fish jumped out of the water for the second time.

"SEE! Fish can drown! That's why he jumped, to save himself!" cried Marcus letting her go.

"Men are so thick" muttered Eiko.

Zidane was about to move in for the kiss when Garnet turned away quickly picked up a plank of wood, turned around and placed it on Zidane's mouth. He didn't notice as he had his eyes closed. The whole time that Zidane was kissing the plank of wood Garnet was trying to refrain herself from collapsing on the floor and crying with laughter.

Marcus had noticed the commotion as he walked up, with Eiko at a distance, and yelled out to Zidane.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Zidane who had now pulled his lips away from the wood was opening his eyes to find everyone staring at him.

"What are you on about? There's nothing wrong with kissing my girlfriend." But secretly Zidane thought that Garnet needed a shave because her chin was quite bristly.

"You were kissing......" Eiko started to yell but stopped as Garnet glared at her clearly warning her that if she said anything she would have her eaten alive by Quina, "....your girlfriend, yeah"

"Well duh! I am entitled to aren't I?" said Zidane rolling his eyes.

"Not without MY permission! I'M queen" snapped Garnet.

"Oh.....sorry my love" replied Zidane as he hugged at her, "By the way you need to shave"

"It's that sort of comment why I won't let you be king"

"What have I said now?"

"You just said that Garnet needed a shave!" said Eiko


End file.
